“If you don’t want to burn out, stop living like you’re on fire.” — Dr. Brene Brown, Best-Selling author and professor oat University of Houston and University of Texas
There was a time when work stayed at work and home stayed at home, and it was a rare occurrence when the two would meet. Today, they don’t just meet — they collide! The boundaries between when and where we work and when and where we get involved in “life” — family, friends, activities, etc. — is blurry for most of us. On the one hand, it can make things convenient. On the other hand, these blurred lines rarely give us the opportunity to turn ourselves “off.” No matter your situation, you need strategies to avoid burnout.
Balance is a misnomer at best
Recognize that while you might want a life that feels a little less pulled in one direction or another, you may not be seeking “balance.” Creating true balance between work and life, equal weight and time for each on the scale, may feel impossible or unrealistic. Give yourself permission to redefine what “balance” best represents for you and what you want it to. Here are a few to consider:
Work-life integration
Work-life flow
Career-family fit
Work-family effectiveness
Work-family blend
Work-life rhythm
Learn to say “No.”
There is only so much of you to go around. Sometimes you will need to tell the boss you cannot take on that extra project (unless they can help you take something off your list of priorities), or you may have to decline to help a friend with an errand that’s out of your way. This does not make you incompetent or unfeeling, and it definitely does not make you a bad person. Saying no means you know how to prioritize and you manage what you’ve already committed to. In the end, you will be seen as more dependable because you don’t make promises you can’t keep. Your work will also be better than if you are stretched too thin.
Offer alternatives that work for you
You’ll be more comfortable turning down a request if you can offer alternatives. But these alternatives have to work for you, too. It’s not helpful to say no to a task or project if the alternative is just going to create more work, anxiety, and stress for you down the road. Wherever possible, look for win-win alternatives such as, “I can’t get to that report until Monday morning. Would that work?” or “I can’t create a spreadsheet right now with all the bidder information, but I have an amazing intern who is looking for more opportunities to help. Can we do that?” As you learn to say “no,” see where you can also offer a “yes.”
Don’t treat “help” like a four-letter word
If you have ever, at any time, helped people, chances are they are looking for an opportunity to reciprocate. And chances are, you’re blocking their efforts by treating “help” like a dirty word. When your colleague offers to follow up on an upcoming safety training, let them! When a team member says that they can attend and take some progress photos on the way into the office, say yes and thank you. Do you really need to catalog the project files yourself, or is there a responsible team member you can assign the task a development activity? Do you need to remind everyone to keep on a specific task or is there a better way of keeping everyone on the same page?
Put everything in its place
This is a common housekeeping rule that can also be applied to balancing work and home. Often it is tempting to “be more productive” by multitasking both worlds at once. Not only does this increase anxiety and drain energy, research shows it dramatically lowers your productivity, accuracy, and focus. Keep your work at work, at the time appointed for work. If you need to set aside an hour at night to complete some work, do it in a section of your home that’s reserved for work. (Try not to take your laptop to bed!) Short of emergencies, leave home at home. Don’t let one come into the other, or they will become distractions. Keeping focused on your obligations in one place at a time will make you more productive on both fronts.
Take breaks
You don’t have to take a break when you are on a roll and productivity is flowing, but experts say that ending your task when you’re still feeling motivated to do more will help you to get restarted to finish the task better than if you had worked until you were completely spent. A ten-minute break when you are having trouble concentrating will also drastically improve your productivity, recharge your batteries, and rest the spinning wheels in your mind. Even a brief trip outside will do wonders for your productivity. Just make sure the breaks are for rest and renewal, not to take on other work. Otherwise, a break will quickly devolve into procrastination, and you won’t yield the physical or psychological benefits.
Don’t do it!
Of course you have a to-do list! But do you have a “don’t-do” list? This is the list of tasks, projects, and activities that you might be tempted to take on—because they’re easy, because you’ve always done them, because someone expects you to do it, because it’s simpler to do it than to delegate or drop it—that will keep you from focusing on what you need to accomplish. What could be on this list? Anything from “Don’t stop by Bill’s desk first thing on Monday morning because he will spend 20 minutes telling me about the weekend,” to “Don’t make copies of the agenda for the meeting since everyone prints their own at home,” to “Don’t draft the proposal because that’s the marketing department’s job.” Figure out what you shouldn’t do—and then don’t do it!
Maintain good health
Your body is like a machine. It needs fuel. Its engine needs to cool down now and then. It needs to be maintained and given regular checkups. But unlike a machine, you cannot go out and get a rental while your worn out body is in the shop. You can’t buy a newer model or trade it in under a warranty. The construction industry is notoriously hard physically and that is directly connected to mental health. We start early, accept pain as normal, and rarely talk about it. That is the real danger. Too many “self-medicate” and the incidence of alcohol and drug use and abuse is a hidden problem – until it isn’t and spills out into the open. In the name of being tough and able to withstand whatever toll the job takes, we ignore our own health and the health of our colleagues. When we ignore our mental or physical wellbeing, things don’t get better—they get significantly worse.
Savor life
Life is something to be nourished, celebrated, and savored. Make sure that you know what you consider a “treat” and make sure you build in some of them to maintain a positive attitude and boost your energy—a long run, a favorite gourmet coffee, a walk around a fun neighborhood, or catching up with an old friend. Have a plan for what you want for your entire life, from going back to school, to traveling abroad, to visiting your grandkids, to buying a boat. Make sure that you regularly revisit that list to stay focused on one of the many reasons that you do what you do.
Treat individuals as individuals
Bob Dylan famously sang “the times they are a-changin” way back in 1964. Greek philosopher Heraclitus also is credited with the concept that the only constant in life is change. The construction industry is no different. Yes, many of the means and methods used to deliver projects have remained the same. Looking around our offices and jobsites, I don’t think we can claim that we are now as we always were. The rise of two-working parent households, single parent families, looming retirement of the youngest in the Baby Boom generation, and challenges in attracting younger workers, women, and non-traditional candidates requires that we accept the changes and take different approaches. Flexibility might be the word we need to adopt when it comes to addressing the diverse needs of our team members. Are there opportunities to create hybrid or flexible work schedules? How can we prioritize productivity over “time on task?” What can you do to foster a more supportive work environment that results in people coming to work more engaged, excited, and energized? As a manager, how will you know what individuals need? You have to ask. As a team member, remember the adage: if you don’t ask, you don’t get. In both roles, communication is the key.
I’m curious how YOU balance your priorities…